All I’ve done is take on the role that the majority want me to have. There isn’t a single person in the group who has a reason for keeping me in that is stronger than their reasons for keeping me out. Here’s how I think the scorecard looks:
- Sister- doesn’t want me to exist because of her issues with me, whatever they are. Happier with me gone.
- BIL – would like to have me back, wants conflict over, but controlled by Sister. Their kids are probably also in the same position.
- Brother #1- would like to have me back, wants conflict over, but somewhat controlled by Sister. Conflicted enough to feel guilty, so ignores “no contact” request.
- SIL #1- unknown, but probably aligned with B#1.
- Susan – doesn’t want someone around who sees through her manipulation and holds her accountable. Happier with me gone.
- Joe – might like to have me back, but controlled by Susan and Sister. Easier with me gone.
- Brother #3 – probably doesn’t much care. Might align with Sister if it gets him a spot.
- Brother #4 – doesn’t want me to exist so he can be the baby of the family and get the attention. Happier with me gone. Annoyed that I’m not 100% gone yet so continues to snipe at me via blog comments.
- SIL #4- unknown, but probably aligned with B#4, as well as their kids.
And if you think that mess is fixable, you’re a dreamer.